A Shame-Informed, Integrative Approach to Help Clients Recover from Emotional Avoidance, Self-Sabotage, and Overachievement
Perfectionism isn’t wanting things to be perfect. It’s needing to avoid the feeling of not being enough.
“An impressive range of practical tools . . . thoughtful, well-written, and engaging.”
Steven C. Hayes, PhD, originator of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
The overachiever who can’t rest. The procrastinator who can’t start. The people-pleaser, the partner who pulls away, the client who numbs out with a joint or a screen, the one who keeps everyone at arm’s length. Different strategies, same fear: you don’t belong as you are. Many of these clients would never call themselves perfectionists. That’s why they symptom-swap, and why treating the behavior alone rarely holds.
A somatic wound: “I don’t belong as I am.” Lives in the nervous system before it’s ever a thought.
Disappointment, vulnerability, inadequacy, rejection: feelings fused with shame, so they can’t be felt.
The rules: “I belong only if I achieve enough, appear perfect, never fail.”
What we see in the room: overworking, people-pleasing, controlling, numbing, escaping.
If you have clients who are stuck, self-sabotaging, or high-functioning and quietly miserable, perfectionism is already on your caseload. Lasting change means working the whole cascade, from safety in the body to the behaviors on the surface. This book shows you how.
Perfectionistic clients fear that self-compassion will make them lazy. The Support–Expectations Grid shows them why it won’t: what changes outcomes isn’t how high the bar is, but how they treat themselves on the way to it.
Comfortable but unchallenged. Self-acceptance without growth, where “good enough” turns into settling.
An inner coach. High standards held with compassion, mistakes as learning, healthy risk-taking, sustainable excellence.
Learned helplessness and disconnection. “Why bother trying?”
Classic perfectionism. The inner critic in charge, “never good enough,” chronic dysregulation, burnout.
The path to healing isn’t lowering standards. It’s adding self-compassion so high expectations become sustainable. The book shows you how to help clients make that move.
Get the free starter kitBlending Internal Family Systems, somatic approaches, attachment theory, ACT, and exposure therapy, this integrative guide will teach you how to:
“Rather than asking people to give up caring or achieving, Treating Perfectionism shows how we can loosen the grip of avoidance and shame so that striving becomes more flexible, compassionate, and connected to what truly matters. This is a thoughtful, well-written, and engaging guide for clinicians and the people they serve.”
“Megan Bruneau has a rare gift for making complex psychological patterns feel both deeply understandable and genuinely changeable. In Treating Perfectionism, she offers clinicians a compassionate, shame-informed framework for understanding perfectionism not simply as the pursuit of high standards, but as a powerful strategy for avoiding difficult emotions—and provides practical, integrative tools to help clients finally step out of that cycle and into a more authentic life.”
“Megan Bruneau completely changes the conversation around perfectionism by showing us that underneath the striving, controlling, procrastinating, and people-pleasing is often something much more human: a fear that who we are isn’t enough. This is the kind of book that will make therapists better at what they do while also making them quietly examine all the ways they’re still trying to earn their own worth.”
Six tools and diagrams from the book, plus a guide to using them in your first three sessions.
We’ll send a quick confirmation email first, then your download. You’ll also get book news and the occasional note from Megan. Unsubscribe anytime.
Seven guided exercises for the moments you’re reacting, spiraling or stuck. Use them yourself, or share them with clients between sessions. Entries stay private on the device, so clients can bring what they notice to your next session.
CE trainings, workshops, and keynotes on treating perfectionism, shame, and emotional avoidance for group practices, coaching and clinical training programs, conferences, and organizations.
Inquire about speakingOrdering for a group practice, coaching or clinical training program, consultation group, or course? Order multiple copies directly through PESI, or call their team at 1-800-844-8260 to ask about bulk orders.
Order through PESIPaperback · 336 pages · PESI Publishing · January 19, 2027
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